6.8 Buried Verbs (Obj. 2)
Your Task. Revise the following to unbury the verbs.
a. Ms. Nelson gave an appraisal of the home’s value.
b. Web-based customer service causes a reduction in overall costs.
c. Management made a recommendation affirming abandonment of the pilot project.
d. The board of directors will give consideration to the contract at its next meeting.
6.9 Lists, Bullets, and Headings (Obj. 3)
a. Use the information in the following dense paragraph to compose a concise, easy-to-read bulleted vertical list with an introductory statement.
Here at SecurityPlus we specialize in preemployment background reports, which we describe in the following. Among our preemployment background reports are ones that include professional reference interviews, criminal reports, driving records, employment verification, and credit information.
Note: All Documents for Analysis may be downloaded from www.meguffey.com so that you do not have to rekey the entire message.
The Correct Answer and Explanation is :
6.8 Buried Verbs (Obj. 2)
Revised Sentences:
a. Ms. Nelson appraised the home’s value.
Explanation: In the original sentence, “gave an appraisal” hides the main verb, making the sentence more complex than it needs to be. By using the verb “appraised,” the action is directly conveyed.
b. Web-based customer service reduces overall costs.
Explanation: “Causes a reduction in” is a verb-heavy construction. “Reduces” is a more straightforward and active verb that communicates the action directly, making the sentence more concise and easier to read.
c. Management recommended abandoning the pilot project.
Explanation: The original phrase “made a recommendation affirming abandonment” is wordy and indirect. By replacing it with “recommended abandoning,” the verb becomes clearer, and the sentence is streamlined.
d. The board of directors will consider the contract at its next meeting.
Explanation: “Give consideration to” is another case of a buried verb. “Consider” is the direct action, and it conveys the same meaning more clearly and concisely.
6.9 Lists, Bullets, and Headings (Obj. 3)
Introductory Statement:
At SecurityPlus, we specialize in providing preemployment background reports. These reports include the following:
Bullet Points:
- Professional reference interviews
- Criminal reports
- Driving records
- Employment verification
- Credit information
Explanation: The original paragraph was dense and difficult to read because it combined several points into one long sentence. Breaking it down into a bulleted list makes the information more digestible. The introductory statement establishes the context, and each bullet point clearly outlines the services provided.
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